Archives for October 2010

No.4 – “What happened to September?!!”

The observant among you will undoubtedly be wondering what happened to the September edition of Top Tips! I can only offer my apologies – having moved house in the last 2-3 weeks, September was a rather hectic month (to say the least), and in addition to that I’ve only just managed to regain internet access.

However, normal service will be resumed in November and with all my recent experiences of organising a house-move, mail re-direction, changes of address and all the other associated activities,I have a number of ideas for topics – ways of managing your emotional state, stress management and dealing with ‘difficult’ people are among those that spring to mind!!

I’d also welcome ideas for any situations you’ve encountered for which you’d like some additional tips, and I’ll be happy to incorporate those into future editions. In the meantime, a quick thought for this month…

Consider how the NLP Presupposition – “What you experience in other people is, in some way, representative of what is going on in you” – can be useful to you.

Next time you encounter a behaviour in someone which you find irritating or ‘difficult’, consider how you too manifest that same quality in your life (although almost certainly not to the same degree or in the same way). For example, if you are ever frustrated by the fact that someone consistently fails to respond to messages from you or to answer urgent queries, ask yourself “How is that me?” Even though you may always return calls or messages quickly, are there nonetheless times when you get distracted, or ignore the needs of others because something more important has taken your attention? Naturally none of us is perfect, but beginning to recognise your own fallibility in this way can make it easier to understand the same characteristic in others – not to agree with it, or even accept it, but as a way of managing your own stress and tensions in those situations.

Of course, the other side of the coin is that if there is a quality or characteristic in someone else that you really value or admire, the same principle applies – you must also have the ability to manifest that same quality or you wouldn’t be able to recognise it in others!

Remember, these NLP Presuppositions (or empowering beliefs) are not necessarily statements of ‘truth’, but acting as if they are true can offer very useful insights and a way of developing your personal flexibility, and creative approaches to what had previously been a difficulty.